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i sit on the computer for like 12 hours a day lmao

thats terrible u should try a chair

(via officialnerdo)


two years ago i was licking a lollipop and some dude said “watching a girl eat a lollipop is a great way to see how well she gives blowjobs” so i bit the lollipop in half and spit it out 

(via breathingdaisy)


my friend who snorts cocaine won’t eat cookie dough because it’s bad for you

(via breathingdaisy)

parents: okay we will be home at 11 o'clock!
clock: 11:01
me: they're dead i'm alone i need to start my orphan life now


when the moon hits ur eye like a big pizza pie


(via officialnerdo)

I wonder if I ever caught someones attention. Even if I was just walking among the crowd, I wonder if they wanted to get to know me or anything like that.

(via breathingdaisy)


did you ever stop to think people are reading this sentence in different accents 

(via breathingdaisy)