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svveden:

bunnyhoodlum:

i sit on the computer for like 12 hours a day lmao

thats terrible u should try a chair

(via officialnerdo)

seejelly:

two years ago i was licking a lollipop and some dude said “watching a girl eat a lollipop is a great way to see how well she gives blowjobs” so i bit the lollipop in half and spit it out 

(via breathingdaisy)

booforce:

my friend who snorts cocaine won’t eat cookie dough because it’s bad for you

(via breathingdaisy)

parents: okay we will be home at 11 o'clock!
clock: 11:01
me: they're dead i'm alone i need to start my orphan life now

rosesalts:

when the moon hits ur eye like a big pizza pie

macklemoré

(via officialnerdo)

I wonder if I ever caught someones attention. Even if I was just walking among the crowd, I wonder if they wanted to get to know me or anything like that.

(via breathingdaisy)

goldenthong:

did you ever stop to think people are reading this sentence in different accents 

(via breathingdaisy)